I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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