Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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