my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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