One girl and one boy is just not enough.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize