i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
