1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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