I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
