have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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