White coat. Heels.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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