Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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