my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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