She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
