I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
