Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
As shirtless as possible
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
