i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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