I love black thongs
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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