I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
