I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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