put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
