you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize