1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
She tied me up with her honor cords...
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
