your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
