i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
