when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
