Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
