dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.