Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
