y did u give ur computer a hand job?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
