P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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