It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
