Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I'm laying in your front yard are you home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I'm laying in your front yard are you home http://tfl.nu/8whw
  Replies (4) Good night (1367) Bad night (493)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem. http://tfl.nu/6hmf
  Replies (34) Good night (1942) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn. http://tfl.nu/vfme
  Replies (18) Good night (649) Bad night (3600)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch. http://tfl.nu/syjm
  Replies (57) Good night (17114) Bad night (1195)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad. http://tfl.nu/2doo
  Replies (31) Good night (571) Bad night (5290)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories http://tfl.nu/tcvk
  Replies (7) Good night (2935) Bad night (1782)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it. http://tfl.nu/dgh5
  Replies (13) Good night (1047) Bad night (3249)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood. http://tfl.nu/i8nf
  Replies (9) Good night (4650) Bad night (976)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  the night ended with taco bell and tears

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): the night ended with taco bell and tears http://tfl.nu/rh7j
  Replies (10) Good night (928) Bad night (1523)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Oh my god she just threw up on her dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for (804): Oh my god she just threw up on her dog http://tfl.nu/gcjh
  Replies (6) Good night (865) Bad night (1353)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok? http://tfl.nu/erl3
  Replies (3) Good night (1465) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock. (785): I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice. http://tfl.nu/kw5d
  Replies (9) Good night (1600) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor. http://tfl.nu/2e0y
  Replies (6) Good night (1451) Bad night (485)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  what are you going as for halloween?

  (805): View more from California

  drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): what are you going as for halloween? (805): drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable http://tfl.nu/bmlt
  Replies (5) Good night (944) Bad night (232)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day. http://tfl.nu/e3fy
  Replies (1) Good night (609) Bad night (259)

Randomize