why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.