paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
lets start a swedish sibling band together
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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