omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
