I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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