Kareoke will never be a sober sport
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
