I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
