I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
