What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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