you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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