I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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