I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
