Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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