Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
