Why does Corona taste like a burp?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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