would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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