I'm really into asian looking animals
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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