Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
