And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
