Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
