my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
