i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
this hospital has no fireball
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
